Death

I just attended the funeral of Daniel's father. Daniel was my platoon mate and so many 8th platoon people attended the funeral. I have never liked attending funerals. Other than the reason that I don't want people around me to die, the other reason is that I do not know how to behave in a funeral. I know I am supposed to feel sad but I cannot really manage to get myself into a sad mood, especially in the presence of friends. This always makes me feel guilty whenever I attend a funeral. I can see that Daniel feels saddened by the loss of his father. I would be if it were me as well. I've got a great dad that I don't think I spend enough time with. I would have liked to share Daniel's burden and sadness but I do not know how to console him and I can't understand how he feels. It was good that Daniel tried to be as normal as he could and the atmosphere was quite light-hearted with everyone talking cock again. Doraemon was also saying that one of his friends died while playing soccer. He suffered a head injury and died as a result. People always say life is unpredictable but you will only feel the gravity of the statement when something tragic happens to someone who is closely connected to you. I am going to die some day and I do not know how and when I am going to die. I will prefer to die in my sleep so that I will always be in dreamland. I am wondering, how will people remember me when I die? Have I made a positive or negative impact in people's hearts? I hope these questions will not be answered soon. I am not afraid of death, I am just afraid of missing out on all the great things that life has yet to offer me.